Grown and Sexy Plaits! Ok… Box Braids to Y’all Youngins…

Move along HC folks…there’s nothing to see here…

For the time being, I regret that I’ve had to take down one of my posts because some members of a particular hairboard have decided that they don’t like one of my hairstyles…the box braids I was wearing in this particular post. Someone has taken it upon themselves to visit my blog and go back to their general discussion forum and make fun of my hair. Then, they posted a link to my blog so that others could come and take a look and then go back to the board and continue to make fun of me and my hair.

I normally have a pretty thick skin, but I’ve been a cyberbully target on that board for several years for a variety of reasons which stem from my involvment on another hairboard. Nevertheless, I’ve never responded in kind, and I’ve never engaged anyone of them in a provcative manner. But apparently, no one is supposed to have an opinion about anything but them, and if you dare engage that opinion, or participate on other hairboards in a manner that doesn’t suit them, they put you in your place (or so they think) and then, unbeknownst to you, run back to this other hair board (probably others too) to talk about you like a dog and encourage others to do the same.

So how did I find out about this? Well…everytime someone visits me here, I can go to my control panel and see where on the internet they came from. In this case, over the past several days, I have tons of links from this hairboard so I followed one and found several nasty and recent posts that linked back to my post here on Nappturology 101. I finally had the courage to stand up to them, tell them how I feel and to report their posts to a moderator. The mod responded and reiterated their rules about this type of behavior, what’s allowed and what is not allowed on their hairboard and told them abide by my wishes and stop this foolishness. As grateful as I am that she has moved to put an end to this, it makes me sad that she and the owner of this site has allowed their hairboard to be used in such a malicious and toxic way when it’s apparently again their own rules.

Nevertheless, I thanked her for her prompt attention to this matter because quite frankly, she didn’t have to do ANYTHING to appease me. But still, if I had a dollar for every negative thing said about me on that site, I could go out and have a pretty darned expensive dinner and probably treat someone to a nice dinner taboot — and that bites.

Hopefully, the moderator has put an end to this madness on that hairboard. Obviously, it won’t stop them from taking it somewhere else, but perhaps they’ll leave it alone…for now. But cyber bullies (as do bullies off the net) almost always find an outlet for keeping mess going. And I’m almost not expecting this instance to be any different, but I’m hoping they’ll find other more constructive and uplifting ways to spend their time on the net.

Makes me tired just having to deal with this.

To all of you who have enjoyed my blog and supported my nappy journey over the past four years or so, I thank you very much! And thank you in advance for your continued support. In the meantime, I’ll just keep doing what I do, try and shake this all off  and hold my head and my hair high with nappy pride. And I’ll damn well wear my version of box braids (or Miss Celie plaits) as a hair style if I damn well please…thank you very much!

 Take care,

15 Responses to “Grown and Sexy Plaits! Ok… Box Braids to Y’all Youngins…”
  1. tnt says:

    tip to styling loose natural hair, think of it as straight hair! any style you can do with straight hair can be done on natural hair!!! and it looks even better, bec of the texture.

  2. sandra says:

    can’t wait to see the pictures. I’m glad you posted this; I go through periods where I just get tired of my hair and the same styles; I wore twists for a year or so and just got tired of it. I”m now doing the curly fro but running into tired issues with that also. My hair is much shorter than yours(now ) Got tired of the length and cut it (what did i do that for???) I’m just tired period. I had the same feelings at times with straightened hair; so this is nothing new. What I’d like to see is the hair books which have all the different styles in short medium and long hair with fine to coarse and c/napp and beyond so one can get new ideas offline without having to visit hundreds of fotki’s online. Oh well! thanks for letting me vent.

  3. Your hair reminds me of my oldest daughter’s from what I can tell in the picutres…and I agree with TNT that most syles look better with more texture and might I add body!

  4. ms-gg says:

    I do box braids every once in a while, a little smaller than the ones you are rockin, but I love them when I do them. I like them because I can wash my hair a lot more and not have to worry about tangling like I do with twists . I hate washing my hair in twists….
    Braids are the buziness

  5. Africa32 says:

    I hope you don’t mind, but I went to your Fotki, because I read this Post and was just curious as to what hairstyle you were talking about and if it was the same pictures of your box braids on there, I didn’t see anything wrong with it! LOL Don’t pay attention to the people that was making fun of your hair! Misery loves company! Just pray for them! Don’t let them bother you! I love your site, its been a big help, and keep up the good work!

    • nappyme says:

      Thank you Africa. I’m not ashamed of them. I’ll admit that I hardly think it’s the cutest hair style ever, but it was something simple that I came up with and it worked for me at the time. I’m not personally a huge fan of box braids on me and they took a minute to grow on me, but I wouldn’t hesitate to wear them again if I so please. That’s what this natural journey is all about, being comfortable enough with your hair and being confident to wear it however you please even when others may criticize. I don’t even care that they don’t like them, but how dare someone come to my blog, go to a hairboard, link to my picture and then make fun of me. I swear, the internet really brings the worse out in people some times.

      I’ll eventually put my original post back up, but I felt it was necessary to take it down and replace it with this current post. Not only did I need to get this off my chest, it put folks on notice that as big as the internet is, you leave e-bread crumbs and e-foot prints back to the source, so you’re NEVER as anonymous as you think. If you don’t care…fine. Just don’t be surprised if the person you’re doggin decides to confront you. I was really nice about it. Someone else might not be.

  6. sandra says:

    I understand. Looking forward to more posts from you…I’ve learned so much and your fine work will be rewarded.

  7. Doreen says:

    I’m sorry this happened to you. I consider you a great source of napptural knowledge and I have greatly benefited from your website and your comments on another website. To me, you are a goal that all new to the napptural scene can work towards. Anyone who doesn’t recognize this and can ridicule you, must be very ignorant. I thought your plaits (I grew up calling them that too.) looked good. When I started wearing them, it took time to adjust but eventually I started to like them. Hang in there, we support you!

  8. Paula Rettenmaier says:

    I enjoy reading your blog, and I think that your pictures are amazing. I liked the box braids! It gives us newly nappies styles to look forward to when our hair reaches lengths like yours. Some people are just petty and never seem to grow up!

  9. NAPPYBOO says:

    I’m sorry you had to experience this hateration. Let me say that there are still folks out there who feel shame about their own natural hair and may not even know why. Then when they see someone like you rockin your beautiful natural hair and feeling beautiful and proud about it, those folks become frustrated within themselves and feel the need to attack. I know that it’s painful when someone does this kind of thing but it may help you to remember where this stuff comes from. It all just self hatred. Pray for those women and keep giving us your musings, pictures and findings concerning nappy hair. Keep showing us the pictures of your beautiful, long, nappy, gorgeous and inspirational HAIR! We love it! Don’t let this unfortunate episode stop you from showing us the simple hairstyles as well as the elaborate ones. We need the simple hairstyles ideas because we all become worn out with doing the elaborate ones. Nappy hair takes alot of TLC and time! You have been a great help to me and your tips have helped me bring my hair back from thin and breaking nappy to thick, full nappy! Your simple advice of moisturizing was all it took for me. We love you, Nappy me and don’t stop teaching us. Show us the box braids from the front! Love, Nappy Boo

  10. Dee says:

    I extremely sad to knowt that this happened to you. We can be so devisive and we practice such mean-spiritedness towards each other that sometimes it just astounds me. We’ll do that kind of ugliness to each other but when someone comes along and tampers with our rights as a citizen we have nothing to say but cutting up another sistah? All aboard! I love your site and I visit it as much as I can. Your information and insight is inspirational and I loved your box braids to the point where you made me want to try them again on myself. Please do not let these people (and I know exactly which forum you’re talking about) sink another inch into your psyche. Count it all good and keep on doing you. There are so many ladies out there who get valuable information and ideas from your sight. These positive ladies counteract the negative.

  11. Tashina says:

    That is a crying shame (the negativity I mean). Didn’t take me long to find that one my own…..

    It’s one of the main reasons why I don’t have a membership to most hair boards anymore. That negativity is something that I can do without.

    I liked your reply nappyme. It was very mature and there was much to be respected in your response. Now back to lurking….

  12. Sharon says:

    What a shame, so sorry to hear how you’ve been treated and how immature are they!! I visit your site every now and again for encouragement, support and inspiration and I always get all three! Being natural in this very fickle world is hard enough sometimes without us hating on each other, but you handle yourself well Girl – personally I think they are racked with jealousy because you have beautiful natural hair, and you are true to yourself.

  13. S says:

    Yanno it just pains me that some of us…r still not free. Donot concern yourself any longer on people who need to poke fun at other’s. The insecurity is pathetic. We should be encouraging one another. I think we get enough discouragement everywhere else. Now, to lurk on someone’s board and gloat is truly pitiful. I remember when my hair in my youth was beautiful similar to hawaiaan girl’s hair. And to please other’s because of “short hair” envy I invoked the perm. I go natural and some people wondor why I donot subdue the “wildness.” And I reply “God made me this way” take it up with him.

  14. Joyce says:

    I appreciate all the info that you have provided to help me with my natural hair over the years. I also visit your site regularly so that I can take advantage of the valuable info that you share. Thanks for all the help that I received from you and please, please continue to educate us on nappy hair.


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